Sunday, March 04, 2007

Sloan - Never Hear the End of It

I will be brief. Sloan's 2007 album, Never Hear the End of It, is the best of their career, and one you should definitely check out. It's as simple as that.

I will now open up the floor to questions.

Q: That's a great review. One thing leaps to mind: who the hell is "Sloan"? You could have just as easily said "My Next Door Neighbor," "My Dog," or "Vixen." No one's ever heard of them, dude.
A: If you lived in Canada, you wouldn't have any problem figuring out who these guys were, you jerk. This is actually their eighth album. Their first album went gold, their second was named "The Best Canadian Album of All Time" in a poll, their fourth album hit #5 on the Canadian charts, they released a compilation album (A-Sides Win) that had 16(!) singles on it with music videos for each song... you get the idea. They've been playing for 15 years. Deal with it.

Q: Okay. What does Sloan sound like?
A: Sloan is very Beatles-esque -- you can't miss it when you hear them. All four guys sing and write songs. Onstage, they switch instruments as well, so they're very talented. This current album is a throwback sound, but in general they can be described as mid-tempo poppy (if you want me to slap a label on them).

Q: Fine -- tell me more about this album.
A: Never Hear the End of It sounds great from beginning to end. I hate to make the comparison (and don't want to oversell this), but I think of Abbey Road when I'm listening to this album. It's not that album, but sounds like a cousin of it. The lyrics and song styles sound straight out of the sixties, in a good way.

Q: These questions here are ridiculous softballs -- who am I, Ahmad Rashad? Matt Lauer? Katie Couric? (They're no longer together, you know.) Anyways, it says here that I should ask you about your ratings of this album.
A: Just read the script, jackass. I put this album directly into my car CD changer. I went to show and bought the album there (for $5 more than I could have bought it at Newbury Comics). I won't complain -- it's well worth $15. If they had a decent t-shirt, I would have bought one of them too. I probably will buy the next one without even reading a review. What more can I say?

Q: You realize this bit is terrible, right?
A: I'm not sure I follow you.

Q: Well, I think it's safe to say that this attempt at "humor" and engaging yourself in some kind of critical dialogue is pretty lame. If I want this kind of entertainment, I'd go and see your friend Evan O'Television. He's got this shtick down, you're a pathetic wannabe.
A: I'm not sure I follow you. Are you sure you're really me? (Nervously laughs.)

Q: You are the same type of smarmy, self-indulgent reviewer you're constantly raving against, and this psychobabble only proves you're a bit of a looney as well. Your opions are lame and not well-informed, and I have a sneaking suspicion you just stole them all from All Music. You make me sick.
A: This interview is over.