Corridor - Real Late (2011)

Dear Corridor:

First of all, there is no damn way I am accepting the capitalization of "corridor - REAL LATE," which is how it comes up in iTunes.  This is a 99% deal-breaker out of the gate, you jackasses.  I'm not joking here -- I almost didn't listen to the damn album simply based on that.

Second of all, that stupid capitalization MAKES NO SENSE as the music behind it is totally smart, very restrained, basically virtuoso folk rock.  It really pisses me off that this is so good, as I am pretty sure (based on capitalization alone) that you guys wear Miami Heat hats with a flat brim, backwards, and slightly tilted to the side.  (Yes, I just described the worst kind of human being.)

Therefore, for the love of all that's holy, accept what you are -- folk maestros crossed with world music leanings -- and stop pretending you are some stupid punks.  You are clearly better than that, so just get rid of that diamond-studded nose ring and get on with it.  It's a great album; accept your "real musicianship" status.  I know it's frightening, but you can be grown-ups now to match your music.

Corridor - "Objective Lens"

Thank you in advance for stopping your campaign of pissing me off.  Please continue in the music vein, however.  It's quite excellent.

Yours,

Snilch

CD Placement Rating:  CAR cd CHANGER.  Jerks.

Kyle Andrews - Robot Learn Love (2011)

This has some serious promise -- just check out "Make Me Feel Human," "Lazer Tag with Imaginary Friends," or "The Search for a Heart," which are electronica/light rock/pop gold.  This album suffers from a lack of consistency throughout, making it ultimately good, not great. 

It's not bad by any stretch, just not something that I'll listen to except for the highlights.  Just a little too bubblegum.  But there is WAY too much promise here to ignore Andrews moving forward -- I'll be very interested to hear his next album.

CD Placement Rating:  Sell-back 1

Making Friendz - Social Life (2011)

Summary:  this is very promising electronic pop from an up and coming artist.  

Here is some free advice that the band probably doesn't need, nor do they probably care.  But as you all know, that won't stop me.  

So... three things:  

• Some of the lyrics are just way too over the top intercourse-y.  Be a little more suggestive.  For instance, "Just take off your clothes/Don't make me cry/I wanna be inside you" is about as subtle as a sledgehammer.
• You write nice guitar/keyboard riffs, which is good.  You repeat them pretty much as-is in other songs, which is not good (unless, of course, you are the late, great Wesley Willis, and writing songs like "Casper the Homosexual Ghost" or "I Whupped Batman's Ass," in which case it's actually expected).
• Just keep at it and you'll figure it out.  There's really good stuff here.  Just cut out all of the bad parts, and replace them with good ones.  See?  Simple.  

Now I put in this official video, but BEWARE:  you'll likely find it gross and NSFW.  (Turns out you are a prude.)  It is a great song, though, so if it bugs you, just hide the viewer and listen instead.

Making Friendz - Situation

At their best, they sound like a slightly less clever Bikini Kill or Le Tigre; at their worst, they sound like a bunch of undersexed (or oversexed) teenagers channelling Ministry's first album.  But this band has a ton of potential and are worth watching.  If they put it all together, they will be great.

CD Placement Rating:  CD Rack.

iTunes Recommendations:  "Situation," "Reject Me," "Symphony."

- Snilch

Masters of the Hemisphere - Maybe These Are the Breaks (2011)

I get a ton of music from Terrorbird, and usually don't have the time to listen to all of it.  But if I have to wade through hours of crap to find a gem like this album, it's totally worth it.

Sounding like a mix of The Shins with a touch of Sonic Youth, Derwin Deez, and The Cure, this is pop music at its sugary sweet best.  While at first listen it sounds like just simple grooves and sounds, there's more to it here:  the music does not pander to the listener, and instead dictates the action.  

It's impossibly happy for having an edge and a real feel to the music.  Think piano, guitar, and harmonies play over a solid if not spectacular rhythm section; it's got enough universality to be easily translatable to almost anyone, yet enough of a musical vocabulary that you won't be ashamed of it as a indie snob (like me).  The only thing I will say bad about this is that it slightly drags about halfway through.  But that is a minor point; it's a great album.

Masters of the Hemisphere - Watch It Go Away

Considering this is their first release in eight years, I may have to check out some of their first four albums.  This is the type of band that I don't think I would hate if I heard on the radio every day, which is where they belong.  And improving the radio landscape while doing so.  

CD Placement Rating:  Car CD Changer

- Snilch